Whipcream and Motoroil
by vsdefender
Summary: B-ko has A-ko right where B-ko wants her. Or does she?


This is a Project A-ko fanfic. The characters are the creation of Yuji Moriyama and Katsuhiko Nishijima and are the property of Final-Nishijima. This fanfic is written without the consent or knowledge of either of those two gentlemen. I hope that this covers all the neccessary legal talk. I doubt that anyone would sue over this modest fanfic but who knows? In our overly litigious society anything is possible.  
  
Whipcream and Motoroil  
by vsdefender  
naughtiusmaximus@juno.com  
  
  
  
  
  
A-ko woke up in a strange place. She was tied to a rough stone wall. She seemed to be bound by a thin stringy material. The room she was in was chilly, dark and full of half finished mecha.  
  
It took her a moment to realize what it was that she was tied up with.  
  
"I've been tied up with dental floss!?" she asked out loud incredulously.  
  
"That's right," said a familiar voice in the darkness. A light came on overhead and standing in front of her was B-ko Daitokuji.  
  
"B-ko! Why do you have me tied up like this?" asked A-ko, puzzled and pissed off at the same time. She happened to notice that B-ko had her hands full. " Huh? What do you have there?"  
  
B-ko gave A-ko a nasty grin. "Just some whipcream and motoroil."  
  
"Uh, what are you going to do with that?" A-ko asked nervously.  
  
"Oh, you'll find out," said B-ko said leering at A-ko and making a big production of licking her lips.  
  
A-ko sighed and rolled her eyes. " I cannot believe that I'm stuck in yet another miserable lesbian lemonfic. You didn't bring any cherries or bananas for that whipcream did you?"  
  
"No but I brought something else that Dr. Freud would approve of," B-ko said and pulled a jar of pickles from a coat pocket.  
  
"Pickles," A-ko groaned. "Why am I not surprised? Still, at least they don't require batteries like most of your little playthings."  
  
B-ko's eyes momentarily bulged in shock. "A-ko, if not for the fact that the no-talent hack that's the author of this cruddy little fanfic has me scripted to smear you with whipcream and motoroil and do unmentionable nasty things with you that frankly makes me sick to think about I would kill you right now!"  
  
"I have had enough of this," A-ko said and tried to free herself from the dental floss. After several unsuccessful attempts to snap the floss she was quite frusterated and snapped, "What the heck is this stuff made out of? I can bust out of huge steel chains without a problem so there's no way I shouldn't be able to snap this lousy dental floss."  
  
B-ko just smirked. "It's a new type of floss that I invented. I call it phansyfloss. It's stronger than any steel chain ever made."  
  
"You're not going to get away with this you...you..... Oh crap! I forgot my lines," an embarrassed A-ko admitted.  
  
"Your next line is to scream for help you moron!" an exasperated B-ko snapped. "Why you are always the star is beyond me. I'm smarter and I'm better looking than you."  
  
"Oh, shut up!" A-ko snapped back. Then she promptly screamed for help.  
  
Instantly a huge section of one the workshop's walls collapsed and a huge muscular man jumped through the hole.   
  
"Who the heck are you?" asked A-ko, hoping that this was indeed a rescue.  
  
"A-ko if you'd bother to actually read the script you'd know who this is," B-ko said with disgust.  
  
"I am Big Buff Looking Guy," said Big Buff Looking Guy, striking a heroic pose. "You may have seen me in such fanfics as "Excessively Silly Short Fic" and "Big Buff Looking Guy Does Graviton City". I've also done some tv work. Perhaps you've seen "Johnny Bravo"?"  
  
"Can't say that I have," B-ko said. "Do you think you could make your rescue attempt if it's not to much trouble? I have a date with C-ko tonight so I'd like to move this along."  
  
"A date with C-ko? Ewwww... nasty," A-ko said. "Anyways, I thought you were still after Kei."  
  
B-ko rolled her eyes. "This is supposed to be a lesbian lemonfic. Remember?"  
  
"Oh, yeah. I forgot," A-ko said.  
  
B-ko put a her head in her hands. "How am I supposed to work with these people? I'll bet that the Tendo sisters don't have to put up with this sort of nonsense in Ranma fanfics."  
  
"You'd be surprised," Big Buff Looking Guy said.  
  
"You're turning out to be a real big help," B-ko told him. "Would you rescue A-ko already?"  
  
"Rescuing damsels in distress is what I'm all about," Big Buff Looking Guy said as he grabbed ahold of the phansyfloss and snapped it like it was floss.  
  
"Who comes up with this stuff?" A-ko asked, starting to get truly annoyed at finding herself in yet another fifth rate lemonfic. "What's with the "Snapped it like it was floss"? It IS floss! What an idiot."   
  
B-ko turned to Big Buff Looking Guy. "Would you rescue her and get her out of my hair? She's giving me a headache."  
  
"Your wish is my command," Big Buff Looking Guy said as he snatched up A-ko and made good their escape.  
  
B-ko looked at the gaping hole in the wall that Big Buff Looking Guy made during his rescue of A-ko. "Well, this pathetic little fic really tanked which is alright by me. I can use the time to come up with a better mecha design."  
  
She looked at the can of whip cream."Hate to see it go to waste," she muttered to herself and shook the can up and then squirted some into her mouth. "Hmm.... not bad."  
  
"Well, it's about to get bad, real bad," a voice behind her cackled.  
  
B-ko turned around and saw two figures standing in her workshop. "Gail! Xena! What are you two doing here?"  
  
"We're here to punish you," Gail answered. "You told the whole universe about us being the Secret Z.E.D. Masters of the Megaverse. We can't just let it slide."  
  
"We're actually the Not So Secret Anymore Masters of the Megaverse," Xena pointed out.   
  
"Are you going to spank me?" asked a hopeful B-ko. Who needed to rub motoroil all over that nasty red-head Magami when one could get a spanking by Gail?  
  
"Exactly, a good spanking is definitely in order," Gail said.  
  
"Actually, we're going to kill you," Xena said, with an evil smile plastered across her face.  
  
"We are going to do no such thing!" Gail shouted at Xena.  
  
"Might I remind you who is running the show?" asked Xena. "Keep it up if you would like to be punished yourself."  
  
"You just got on my last nerve," Gail said and booted Xena extremely hard. She flew into the corner of the workshop, bounced off a wall and was knocked out cold.  
  
B-ko looked at Gail with huge eyes. "You're my hero!" she said and gave him a bone crushing hug.  
  
Gail noticed the quart of motoroil in her hand. "Is that motoroil you have there?" he asked.  
  
"Yes, would you like to smear it all over me?" B-ko purred.  
  
"Not really, I have a Celica outside that's down a quart," Gail replied.  
  
"Men! All they care about is one thing," B-ko grumbled.  
  
"My offer for a vigorous spanking still stands," Gail said.  
  
"Alright! And after the spankings we can have.."  
  
Gail shut B-ko up by putting his hand over her mouth. "Don't say it. Fanfiction.net is a fanfic site with the occasional under-age reader."  
  
"What a prude," B-ko complained.  
  
The End   
  



End file.
